“Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.” Luke 23:34
We all have been on the receiving side of offense. Maybe it was a coworker who spoke ill of you to you or behind your back, it may be a stranger cutting you off on the highway while waving with a one fingered salute, or perhaps a more personal strike, a parent, a loved one, that spoke a wounding blow or an unmentionable act to your soul.
Unfortunately, there is no avoiding it.
Wait?! What?!
Yeah, you read that right, but allow me to explain. What I meant by that is that we can’t control what others say or do, however, what we can do is choose to not receive what they said or did to penetrate our Spirit. When our Spirit has been contaminated, it’s hard to worship, to be joyful, and it’s even hard to be helpful to others. You see, it easily starts to fester in all that we do. We can get mad at God for not stopping the person or find ourselves cemented in the offense. And in that process, we sin.
Sin? How?
Well, we take the position of judge and jury. We start constructing false narratives of those around us and we begin building walls in attempts to guard our hearts from being hurt again. We harbor on the offense so much so, we let the enemy get to our hearts and justify staying in a position of hurt or victimization, so we can not only judge those who hurt us, but prejudge people who haven’t even done anything. We believe the lie that we can’t overcome by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony. We believe that greater is the lie spoken over me than God who resides in me.
Does any of that sound familiar to you? So what do we do? Our feelings are valid. We’re sad, we’re mad, heck, we’re straight up angry at times. But we aren’t supposed to let our feelings dictate our life. We live in a culture where it’s all about, “you do you boo,” “YOLO,” “an eye for an eye,” and “you better get yours,” and they all lead to sin. Those sayings though I’m sure were never intended to be something other than motivational, we have to caution ourselves to the world narratives. If we allow today’s culture sayings to take Hierarchy over what God says about who we are, then we’ve made ourselves into idols. We’re kidding ourselves. We’re doing the exact same thing that Eve did in the garden. Fooling ourselves into believing that we are capable of being like God. Remember, that’s how Lucifer fell too.
So how can I encourage you my friend? I can tell you that, all that you have been through in this life, all the hurts, the pains of loss, the struggles, are not a sign of weakness but a sign of greatness. David went through so much before becoming King. He was anointed long before he was crowned in position. But he needed to find himself with an understanding that God was going to do something in his life that no man could have ever predicted, including his own father. God took a shepherd from the back of fields and made him a King.
When God is for you, He’ll position you to overcome many objections/contradictions in your life. When it doesn’t make sense to those around you, it’s Gods favor that has positioned you, not your qualifications. As you learn to overcome and submit to God the offenses, the trials, the pains of life, you are allowing yourself to be positioned for His glory!
When Jesus hung on the cross and was praying for those who were afflicting him, “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do,” this was an obedient act of power being taken away from those who were mocking Him. Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. It’s not for the offender! It’s for you! We have to let it go.
Easier said than done right? Yes! I’m right there right now walking it out. I find myself with false expectations of the people, (the offenders) and readily find myself staying in offense. But staying here is exhausting! I want to live victoriously! Don’t you?
I’m encouraged in Psalms 23.
Psalms 23:4-6 NKJV - Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; For You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; My cup runs over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me All the days of my life; And I will dwell in the house of the Lord Forever.
God is for us! We may be walking through the valley of offense, but we don’t need to build a retirement home there! God is there to comfort us! Not only that, but He prepares a table before us in the presence of our enemies! Seeing, though my enemies are near us, our God is both near and within us!
He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world. 1 John 4:4
Just like David, I'm anointed! My cup runs over and yes, surely goodness and mercy will follow me ALL THE DAYS OF MY LIFE! Don't forget to also dwell in the house of the Lord Forever. There is always an exchange.
I love hearing the teachings by Joyce Meyer, when she says the best way to move forward in forgiving someone who has offended you, is by blessing them. I don’t know what that is going to look like for you, but for me, I was challenged to pray for them. I believe I’ve said it before, but it’s hard to stay mad at someone who you are praying for. I pray that the Lord would give me grace to see the offender through His eyes and not mine. Make time to seek direction on how you can bless your "offender."
Father, I thank you for today and allowing me to be able to share the realness of the hurt of offense with You. I’m so grateful for your mercies being new every morning. Knowing that I have been forgiven of so, so much, help me to not withhold the same grace that you’ve given me and extend it to others. Remind me that forgiveness is a gift I give myself. I’m positioned for Your favor as I walk through the valleys. You remind me in 2 Corinthians 12:9 Your grace is all I need. Take the offense Lord and in exchange I open my heart for Your grace. In Jesus name I pray - Amen
Learning to live unoffended with you,
Your little pearl – Perlita